So if the word, “I”, does not refer to my body or my thoughts… (see the last two posts to get up to speed)… then what’s left? My emotions? Those non-thinking gut reactions I have to the world around me, those relished moments of bliss, those uncontrollable instants of anger, those all too frequent feelings of depression, boredom, and confusion? Is that who I truly am? Wow. That would be scary!
As hard as it is to control our thoughts, for most of us it’s that much harder to control our emotions. They can change at the drop of a word, or at the movement of a car cutting in front of us in lane and they can range from the ridiculous to the unbelievable. At their least, our emotions trigger within us a whole range of feelings that can not only alter our mood but affect how we view and interact with the world around us. At their worst they can give us an excuse to cause irreparable damage to ourselves and others that can never be repaired.
More and more our society seems to be producing individuals who are controlled by their emotions instead of the other way around. Violent jealous outbursts, workplace mass killings, and road rage shootings come to mind as examples of the power of the emotions within. Such emotions are ephemeral. They come and they go, unbidden and often unchecked. Yet not everyone lives at the mercy of their emotions. So since emotions can have reins placed on them, can be controlled, and not acted upon, then the answer would have to be ‘no’, emotions are not who we are.
From formal psychology and psychoanalysis to Alcoholics Anonymous, entire disciplines have sprung up to help us control our emotions and take charge of our actions. We are not at the mercy of our feelings, or at least we shouldn’t be. And while our feelings do affect us, they should not dominate us. “Get angry,” I was once told by an enlightened teacher. “For one full minute get as mad as you want. Then put it behind you and get on with your life.”
Our emotions are very powerful and very real. But the fact that they are constantly in flux while we are always ‘I’ means that they are not who we are. Plus, since we can look at them as they are happening means they are external to the ‘I’ who is doing the observing, and that’s another clue that they are not our true selves.
So putting it all together, we are not our bodies, our thoughts, or our emotions and seem to be back where we started, trying to answer the question, “Who Am ‘I’?” The Hindu spiritual master, Ramana Maharshi, used to answer that question by asking one of the seeker in return. “Who is asking that question?” he would ask.
Chew on that one for a week or so and I’ll try to pull it together in the next post. Or go to GamesofConsciousness.com and see if you can figure it out for yourself. To be continued…
peace………..ag
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